I turn 0x1F* on Saturday which puts me with one foot squarely in the grave. There's no mistaking it, I'm old. I haven't been this old since I turned 0x1E, nearly a year ago.
I'm officially Sir now. I haven't been "dude"-ed at Blockbuster in at least five years, and the way the kid behind the counter looked at me when I asked for "The Breakfast Club" is still burned into my retina. You'd have thought I was asking for a silent film or something.
I went to Red Robin yesterday, a place I've been happily carded for years, but this time my receding hairline and advancing pooch caused the young greeter to immediately offer me a seat at the bar. I suspect he was right on the edge of helping me to the senior section until I shot a stern old-guy look at him.
I'm pulling gray hairs out of my once Magnum-PI-quality moustache. I'm wondering if I need more fiber in my diet. I'm disappointed when Law & Order is a repeat. I Tivo Oprah. I've said "these young punks" while at the mall. I wonder how parents let their daughters out of the house with their butts hanging out while simultaneously wondering where these chicks were when I was in High School. I watched Napoleon Dynamite with the wife recently and explained (in about 20 minutes) all the different sub-classes of Geek (Dork, Dweeb, Spazz, Stoner, Theater Geek, Computer Nerd, etc) and my standing in the genus. I played Bard's Tale on my C64 emulator recently and wonder why the graphics weren't as good as I remember them being. I started with 128kb and now have 2gig. My watch has more CPU power than my own failing mind.
Yep, it's a milestone, with 0x28 not far beyond, and beyond that, death.
On a related note, this Friday, I will be completely and totally prepared to enter High School. I think I have the tools and emotional maturity now.
* That's 31 in Hex, just an FYI for my cousin Jack, who scored a 13 on the recent Nerd Test. He's "balanced" and goes "outside" and "gets involved with his community." Sheesh.